I’m at this beautiful wedding. Watching a friend getting married to the love of her life. I’m so happy for her. I’m sitting here by myself. Boyfriend for went coming because he had a f’d up night and wasn’t feeling coming to the reception. So I’m sitting here by myself surrounded by couples.  This is the best wedding ever.  The host is a comedian Jay Martin and he is hilarious. The wedding is so  out of the box  it’s so good. Yet I’m here by myself.  I’ve never been to a wedding on my own. I want to leave because the love around me reminds me of what I want so bad for myself and it’s so awesome yet so sad at the same time. I feel so crappy. As soon as the dance part comes I plan to leave. This is like a mirror that is reflecting a sight I can hardly stand to look at. This is so hard. I feel so down. It’s reaching epic proportions. I can’t handle it. But I want to say that my friend deserves this more than anything.  I am very happy for her!