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I had a long convo with my brother today. Told him how I feel about things happening in my life. My dad confessed to me (I think it was a guilty conscience) that he spoke with my ex recently. They didn’t talk about me but about everything else happening in my ex’s life. I was speechless and offended. I didn’t understand why my dad, after everything that happened, why he would talk to him. It brought up old wounds and me feeling like I just want to be loved. I talked with my brother about feeling like I missed the love I thought I had minus the person who hurt me. I don’t miss or want him but I miss feeling like I was accepted, flaws and all for who I am.

I just want to be loved. I want to be cherished. I want to feel like I am important and that I matter. I want to feel love again