I’ve been MIA for very good reasons. I launched my Spring 2013 Collection and I have been marketing and promoting that all last week. I have a PR company wanting to represent me so they asked me for some things that I had to send in. In the meantime I’ve pretty felt sad and on Friday it got worst and I began to feel damn near depressed.
We had a convo tonight where he talked indirectly about leaving. His departure has been pushed back a few weeks. I still feel sad but now the supposed inevitable is now delayed. The clock ticks on with time added. So after I showered, tweeted (about my new favorite yogurt), did my hair and watched Shah’s of Sunset I sat and let my thoughts linger for a moment and I cried for literally 20 seconds tonight. I gave myself permission to because, well I was feeling sad.
The few tears that fell from my eyes fell for a few reasons; they fell because this situation sucks and I wonder if I am the only one who thinks we have a great connection (maybe it’s one sided and it’s all in my head?), they fell because I wish he didn’t have to go (even though I know he has to), they fell because I don’t want to start over, they fell because I’m tired of this, they fell because I have no control and they fell because I have to adjust whether I like it or not and no matter what I cannot change the situation. Lastly they fell because I have to accept it. But if I could get through prior hurts and heartaches I can get through this too.
I. Can. Get. Through. This.