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So I still feel a way about confessing my feelings to M and his response. I guess I don’t deal well with rejection which sucks but I know this is a learning experience that I can file away. About a week ago  I messaged him to say “hey, how are you?” and he didn’t respond…at all. Again, I felt dumb. Wow, if that doesn’t send a message I don’t know what does. Made me feel even worse than I did initially because I didn’t think he would respond that way to me at all. Am I that bad? I don’t think so and why should I question my personality and looks for him? Perish the thought because that’s ridiculous but for a moment it ran across my mind and I entertained it for a quick minute before deciding it was stupid. Its sucks, I thought he was a different guy and this is a major asshole response. I spoke to our mutual friend to see if he had more insight but he is also puzzled.

I don’t anticipate running into M any time soon unless our mutual friend has a get-together in the near future. Good thing is, we don’t run in the same circles nor do we live near each other. But we do go to the same types of clubs so I sit and wonder to myself if I should,  every time I head out with the girls I make sure my body is extra toned and amazing and I look great just in case I run into him or he sees me. That’s too much energy on someone who can easily act like that after knowing me for over a year. Just a straight asshole. Good news is time is making that bad memory fade away. Lesson learned: when a woman tells a man that she likes him know that moment took a lot of courage to do.

The jury is still out as to if I will be doing that again with someone else.

Talk to you all soon.

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