Invariably when the weekend comes around I always begin to feel a bit of anxiety about what I’m going to do to fill up my time. A part of this reason is because one of the things the ex told me was I wasn’t interesting and didn’t want to go anywhere. Not true in fact it was the other way around but he needed to project his insecurities on me and burn his bridges so he said the first thing that came to his mind. He later apologized and said he didn’t mean any of it. I don’t believe him. In fact almost everything that has come out of his mouth since I don’t believe but that’s another post for another time.
So here I sit wondering what to do. My ankle feels sore and I can’t find anyone to go to Luxy with me to see Nicki Minaj so I guess its another me day at home. *heavy sigh* I know I am not what he said. When my ankle was better I was never home. In fact when I was with him I always wanted to go out somewhere and he was the one content being a recluse behind his laptop but back in January I was still blaming myself. In February and March the same thing. Its only been since July that it began to sink in that I he truely doesn’t define me, my actions and my life. Funny how that work eh? You know its a lie yet you still hold close to it.
Do you have something mean someone has said to you that your still holding onto even though you know its not true?
Till next time.