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Sometime I feel a little bit lonely. Dating is hard. Muscle doesn’t want to pursue aggresively so I’m left wondering if I should call him or wait till he calls me. Europe’s uncle passed away and aside from hearing from him Tuesday I haven’t heard anything since. He told me he is meeting a friend for coffee wednesday. No word today but the day isn’t over yet I guess.
I met someone online on a dating site. He lives in Edmonton and he’s pretty nice. I’ll see how that works. Small snag is he lives there but good thing is he’s moving here soon. He’s 28, ex military, 1 dog and a cat type of guy. No kids, no crazy ex wives and he’s from Finland so I’ll name him Finn.
I wonder if I have a problem relating to men in a flirty fun way. Is my guard too far up? Am I ready to date?
I really want to recover and be better off than I was in December. But I miss companionship a lot. I guess this is something I have to work through some more and just get through it. My mind knows I have to but my heart longs for the comfort and security of having someone there. Then inevitably I remember the security I thought I once had and I either feel sad or angry. He was never worth my time. I am better than what he had to offer.
I have to remember to tell myself that everyday.
Here’s to trying and succeeding! Goodnight everyone

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